So this week is my last week of work for my current employers.
I have been working there for 3 years, and working hard. I pulled in extra shifts worked through breaks and lunches day in and day out. Now my time there is coming to a close, I am asking myself was it worth it?

It’s a conclusion that I am not sure how to answer. Yes I enjoyed my role and the people I worked for. Yes I got promoted quickly into my current role, but after that it was going downhill.

I have spent 2 and a half years running a team in sales, we have had some huge highs and some stormy lows. I was happy to do whatever the boss asked because I was happy to, she respected me on some levels and I appreciated that after all it’s more than what most people got.

The problem was when I fell pregnant and was marching into maternity leave. My manager did not appreciate that all of a sudden I had something more important in my life other my job. She felt a pang of jealousy that someone 12 years younger than her is successful in both career and home.

But this wasn’t the only change. The teams around us were changing, the management were changing, the whole department was changing and not for the better. And I kept asking myself why? What catalyst was so strong to make several people leave and for other people to want to leave but didn’t have another role to go into?

For me it was because management had lost touch of the staff who worked and still work for them. They have their eyes closed to how people are really feeling, as if they wake up in denial that the business they built is crashing down around them. The don’t understand the importance of man-management when that is the most important underlying factor of their role. They always ask the question “what are you going to do?” instead of “what am I going to do?”.

In my last week it feels as if the chains are coming off and I am going to run across the beach into the sea and swim away, I feel free from the delusional state that work has put me in. I am free to pursue a role that will give me my own independence, my own security and most of all the freedom of opportunity.

Amen to the pursuit of opportunity.

“How wrong is it for a woman to expect the man to build the world she wants, rather than to create it herself?”

The realisation that I fend for myself hits me every morning when I open my eyes. I pray for the day to be light, fair, swift and generous, I hope that I am given the chance to provide for my son and husband, support my sister and brother, and forgive my mother and father for their lack of infrastructure. 

This is my place of peace and tranquility, my opportunity to write how I feel, what I want to achieve and what I have studied in other people. It will be honest, it will be factual but most of all it will be my opinion..